最高のプレゼント

　プレゼントをあげるとき多くの人が困っている。プレゼントを上げる相手はどんなものが好きかわからない場合が普通だ。特に、異性の相手にプレゼントを決めるのは大変だと思う。
　とても親しいな相手なら、どんなプレゼントでもいいじゃないか？きっと喜んでもらってくれると思う。私はプレゼントについて聞かれたら、全く違うのことを答える。
　僕が考えているのは人に教えることだ。服とか、食べ物とか、他のものも時間が経つと、なくなってしまうけれど、相手に教えたことはたぶん人生に忘れられないだろう？相手がその教えたことをするとき、教えてくれた人の事をきっと思い出すと信じている。
　例えば、僕の小2のとき、アンディさんが祈り方を教えてくれた。大学生のとき、親友がひらがなを教えてくれた。山形にいるとき、友達のなっちゃんがピアノを教えてくれた。最近、友達のキヨ君がケーキの作り方を教えてくれた。
　人生の中にいろいろな経験があると思うけど、一番印象が残るのは誰かと一緒にやってみたことだと強く信じている。

Free Counselling

May kaibigan ako na lumapit sa akin at humingi ng payo tungkol sa pinoproblema niya ngayon. At malamang sa hindi, alam nating lahat kung ano ang problema niya-LOVE (pag-ibig). Itago na lang natin siya sa pangalang Emerald (promise, hindi ko itatago sa pangalang Terrence ang BF niya). Meron na ring ilang taon na magkarelasyon sila ng BF niya. Through thick and thin 'ika ga. OK naman ang pagsasamahan nila pero nito raw mga nakaraang buwan at naging puro di pagkakaunawaan ang nangyayari sa kanila. Madalas na nauuwi sa sigawan at wala nang magawa si Emerald kundi ang tumahimik at huwag na lang tapatan ang inis ng BF niya.

Sabi ko, lahat naman siguro ng magkarelasyon nagkakaroon ng di pagkakaunawaan. Pasasaan ba't magkakabati na rin kayo. Pero iba raw ngayon kasi napapadalas na. Lagi na lang katuwiran ng BF niya ay pagod ito sa trabaho kaya madaling mainis.

These frequent quarrels began to take its (their?) toll. Nagiging burden na raw sa kanilang pareho. Di ko lang sure kung burden ang pag-aaway o ang relationship mismo. Nahihiya akong magtanong dahil ayokong marinig ang ikinatatakot kong sagot.

Well, ang counselling na ito ay nakapagpaalala sa akin sa mga nangyari mismo sa akin noon. Meron din taong malapit sa akin na sobra kaming close-so close to the point na noong di na rin kami nagkakasundo, naging burden na hanggang sa di na kinaya ng friendship, ayun nauwi sa hostility. Matagal na panahon ko rin dinala sa dibdib ko iyon. Lagi kong itinatanong sa sarili ko kung anong kasalanan ang nagawa ko para mabalewala ang good times na pinagsamahan namin. Ilang panahon ding pinag-isipan ko ang sagot-o baka ilang panahon ding iniwasan kong tanggapin ang sagot na alam ko na pala sa umpisa pa lang. Medyo matalinhaga pero ganun talaga. Hanggang sa paglipas na nga ng panahon, natanggap ko na na wala nang pag-asa for a reconciliation. Di biro-biro ang pinagdaanan kong ganun.

Naging OK din naman na para sa akin ang lahat. Mukhang OK na rin naman sa estranged friend ko. Mukhang OK na to the point na kahit huwag nang magkaayos eh tutuloy pa rin ang buhay.

Yan din sana ang gusto kong ipayo sa friend kong namomroblema ngayon.-Na kung burden na para sa kanilang dalawa ay dapat i-give up na, i-let go na. Sabi nga nila, kung mahal mo ang isang tao, set him or set her free. Kung bumalik eh di masaya. Kung hindi eh, at least hindi na hahaba ang kalbaryo ninyong dalawa. Pero hindi ko rin naman masabi na ganun ang gawin niya kasi ako mismo napagdaanan ang pain ng ganun. Kaibigan ko pa nga lang , ganun na kahirap. Paano pa kaya kung karelasyon mo na talaga?

Sasamahan ko na rin ng payong magdasal at hilingin sa Itaas na gabayan Niya ang friend ko. Kaya naman niya yun, kasi ako nga nakaya ko eh.

I'm back!

After three months of silence, I am back to the net. I moved from Yamagata Prefecture to Mie Prefecture last April and started my first official work in Japan. I am a company employee in a car wiring manufacturing firm. Working in Japan gives me both the challenges of fitting in with the Japanese workplace and at the same time the excitement of working abroad.

In the company, we are not allowed to use the internet for personal perposes. So I waited until I got internet connection in my new place. I am now living in a company dormitory. Actually, it looks so similar to my old apartment in Yamagata except that it is bigger and the toilet is now separated from the bathroom. I am thinking of touring you around in my later posts.

Working for three months made me think of a couple of things. Working in Japan turned my former student life upside down. What I mean is that before, I used to have lots of time lazying around but have little to no money at all. Now, it is the opposite. I have some money but I have no time to travel or have fun somewhere. Good thing that I have internet now so I can simply sit down and relax at home while watching local (Filipino) TV programs through streaming video.

Another thing in my mind is that I work double everyday. I need to accomplish all my daily tasks and at the same time, I need to cope up with the language. I've been in Japan for three years already but I still find Japanese difficult for me to understand. I can speak, read and write in Japanese for a certain degree but I am frustrated that my Japanese skills are not yet enough.

Living and working in Japan is so comfortable. Commuting is simple as the railway system is quite efficient and always on time. The company provides almost everything that I need-a place to stay, utility fees, transportation expenses, food and family allowances that not even the "prestigeous" companies in Manila is willing to provide.

Living in country like Japan makes you adjust not only to the locals but to the other foreigners as well. In my three-month stay in Mie Prefecture, I felt that some people from C are quite not pleasant. I know a batchmate who always pester me for favors to the point that he's now annoying me every time he rings my phone. In times that I can't comply to his [obviously selfish and "magulang na"] requests, he makes some "parinig" and petty threats. Oh, what a bum!

Anyway, I'll just continue filling my list on my next post. I am now a bit sleepy and I need to go to bed soon. Japan is a place where tardiness is being frowned upon so a bit of advice to my fellow "kababayans" out there who are aspiring to work and live in Japan, get rid of the so-called "Filipino time". Till then!

Sana Maulit Muli

(I Wish It Could Happen Again, 繰り返したらいいな)

I won't write about ABS-CBN's soap but let me borrow its title for today's entry. Looking back to the days that passed, I can always say to myself, "I wish it could happen again." Not because I want to relive the moments, but to correct something in the past so that the present and the future will take a different course. Yeah, I refer to the things in the past that I consider my mistakes. Who would want to change happy moments in their lives? Do I sound pathetic? Yeah, may be in a way.

I've been slacking for three years ever since I came to Japan. I came here to study but circumstances led me not to exert my fullest efforts to finish my program. I've been a carefree student and I feel so much ashamed for that. Knowing that I will be graduating next week assured me that somehow I have completed all my requirements but deep inside, I feel discontentment as I wasn't able to put up a good fight. I just let myself go with the flow and just finish things just for the sake of merely completing them as they were required. This is one of the things that I always wish na sana maulit muli.

Another thing was my interpersonal relationships. Being away from my family led me to seek friends in Japan. I felt blessed having many friends, most of them were my Filipino acquiantances in the church. However, as friendships get deeper, my involvement with them had gone deeper as well... and involvement meant not only getting caught into good stuffs but with the not-so-good experiences as well. I won't elaborate more but one sad incident concerning me, and a Filipina friend spoiled everything. We had an argument in which news about what happened reached other people as well. I saw several reactions and I tell you, not all of those reactions were sympathy on my side. I came to the point of severing my ties with other friends as well. I started to see disadvantages of having them as friends. I started complaining that they do ask more and greater favors from me as compared to what favors I received from them. It was not my nature to count favors against favors but I really turned out to be that superficial. Good thing was, it didn't last long. I came to my senses and felt that not all of my friends are like that other friend who treated me bad. Suddenly I came to realize that more people are concerned about me. I felt so touched and I appreciated all the concerns so much.

Another thing was with my lovelife. I was loved and loved in Japan and even in the Philippines before coming to Japan. I really want to go back to the past and do something. Supress love towards the wrong person and wait to love until the right time. It may be so vague but somehow, these are also things that I regret doing in the past.

Anyway, tomorrow is always a new day and a fresh new start. Maybe instead of sulking and wishfully thinking that the past may be changed, I should focus more on the present to make way for a better future. 決まった！

Work! Work! Work!

In the next few weeks, I will be saying goodbye to my student life. Also, in the next few weeks I need to face the consequence of bidding goodbye to that academic chapter of my biography--I need to work.
This past few days I've been thinking what kind of work I should do this time. Three years ago, I quitted my jobs as a software engineer--a computer programmer in layman's terms. I worked by developing softwares for our clients who happen to be big international companies. Well, for two years, I shed time, sweat, blood and tears just to accomplish every task that was laid before me. Those two years were so full of experiences--both enriching and hurting intertwined. Enriching because I developed my interpersonal skills and my skills in programming. Hurting because all of my efforst seemed to be unappreciated. That was my brief stint in the information technology world.
A few weeks ago, I had a number of chat sessions with a former officemate. Of course, old stories like the perenial overtime work and the infamous team leads were not spared during the trip to memory lane. My friends sighed his sentiments as to what lead him to quit his job--despite the fact that he has been promoted to team lead status. Well, I also had my own share of sourgraping but what made me ponder more was when I replied to him that I still love my work and I enjoyed the time I had been in the firm. I know I said that with vindiction but we all know how painful my last year in the company had been. To make the long story short, due to some incompetent people labeled as our superiors, my performance was under assessed which lead to my annual income increase to be put on hold that same year which hurted me so much. As a protest to that, and to other wrongdoings of our so-called superiors, our senior team members left the team one by one, with me leaving the firm itself as the third member. News from teammates left behind kept me posted as to who left the team or the company afterwards. Right now, the team seems to have become stable again but still when talks between us former colleagues start, we still recall how happy we were eventhough we were experiencing physical and emotional stress during and beyond our working hours.
Having that not that sweet two years in the IT field made me think again... and again whether I should engage myself again in an IT-related work. Looking at the simple reasons, I still want to work in Makati. I still want to hit the computer keyboard. I still want to code and debug computer programs. I still want to do testing and maintenance. I still love my work. But, ooops! There are also some other things to consider like the pay and the career path. These things never crossed my mind the first time I signed my contract with them. But it seems that these are the more important things to consider when signing in again for a job. Anyway, right now I haven't decided yet what work I'll be doing in about a month's time but definitely, IT is still on the list.

お母さん、日本へようこそ! (Mama, Welcome to Japan!)

　２月２０日。僕は東京に行ってきた。主な目的は母を成田空港で迎えに行くことだが、途中で、旅券を返信しに六本木にある在日本フィリピン大使館へ行った。そちらに一度も行ったことがなかったので、行き方がわからなかった。大使館の公開ホームページを参考にしたのに、アクセス情報がわかりにくかったため、自信がなかった。友だちに行き方を聞いたが、友だちも詳しい情報を教えてくれなかった。まあ、周りの人に聞こうと思いながら、旅立った。

　東京駅からの路線情報をインターネットで検索して、ノートにメモした。やはり、東京の複雑な鉄道はすごかった。電車の中はひどく込んでいて、本当に都会にいるという感じがした。自分のこの先の働く姿をイメージしながら、電車から電車まで乗り換えて、麻布十番駅に到着した。

　ここからはどうするのと自分に聞いた。駅を出てから、すぐ前に麻布十番周辺地図が見つけた。地図を従って、１０分ほど歩いた。大使館から少し歩きすぎたが、やっと見つけた。用事がすぐ済んでしまった。用事がもう住んだので、今はそちらへ向かっているよと友だちの阿部さんに電話した。麻布十番駅に戻るとき、雨が降ってきた。近くのコンビニーで、５００円のビニール傘を買った。

　今回は大使館へ行くときのルートと違うルートをした。やはり、今朝のルートは高くて簡単じゃなかった。今朝のルートは：東京ー（東京メトロ丸ノ内線）ー＞赤坂見附ー（東京メトロ銀座線）ー＞青山一丁目ー（都営大江戸線）ー＞麻布十番。今回は：麻布十番ー（東京メトロ南北線）ー＞四ッ谷ー（東京メトロ丸ノ内線）ー＞東京。時々、インターネット検索にも信頼しないほうがいいときもあるんだようね。

　東京駅から、さいたまの吉川駅までの行き方を阿部さんから聞いたんだけど、そのとき、電車の事故があったので、違う行き方になってしまった。ドキドキしながら、周りを見て、電車に乗った。電車が止まってる毎回のときが緊張していた。ここで降りるかなという悩んでいる気持ちだった。でも、いよいよ、阿部さんと会った。

　阿部さんのお宅に、阿部さんのお母さんもいた。２時間、吉川図書館でスタジオジブリの「耳をすませば」といアニメーション映画を見た。その映画は昔から見たかったので、嬉しかった。最初は眠くなってしまったが、映画の後半のときは真剣に見た。映画は面白くて、僕は感動して。

　阿部さんのお宅に戻り、晩御飯をご馳走になった。阿部さんが吉川駅から成田空港までの行き方を教えてくれた。成田駅で成田空港行きの電車に乗るのが遅刻してしまったので、２０時３０分の電車に乗ることになった。母の飛行機の到着予定時刻は２０時１０分だった。

　すべてのお客さんが成田空港第一ターミナルから出ると思ったので、そこのターミナルに母を待っていた。１５分が経つと、母の飛行機の便名がまだディスプレーに出てこないので、案内デスクに問う合わせした。母の飛行機は２０時ちょうど到着して、第二ビルにいるとわかった。

　第一ターミナルから第二ターミナルまでの連絡バスがあって、本当によかった。バスに乗って、急いで第二ターミナルに行った。もう一時間が経ったので、母を待たせたので、自分が悪かった。第二ターミナルに入り、周りの人の顔を見て、母を捜した。母は何処にもいなかった。泣いてしまうほど心配していた。警察に行ったのかな?もう一回到着口に戻ると、母が立っていた。僕が走って、母を抱きしめた。母は到着口を出たばかりということがわかって、安心した。母が無事に日本に来て、本当によかった。しかし、もう遅いので、成田エクスプレスの切符の販売はもう終了だった。リムジンバスで東京へ行った。

　たっぷり時間があって、山形行きの夜行バスに待っていた。一緒に山形に帰った。母の日本での一日目だった。

Mama in Japan pictures/ママの来日ギャラリー

Mama in Japan picture gallery! I'll keep on uploading more pictures so visit it often.
ママの日本での冬休み！これからも新しい写真をアップロードするので、また来てくださいね。

http://ebdeguzman.multiply.com/photos/44

Seasons in the Sun

Seasons in the Sun
by the Westlife

Goodbye to you my trusted friend
We've known each other since we were nine or ten
Together we've climbed hills and trees
Learned of love and ABC's
Skinned our hearts and skinned our knees

Goodbye my friend it's hard to die
When all the birds are singing in the sky
Now that spring is in the air
Pretty girls are everywhere
Think of me and I'll be there

We had joy we had fun we had seasons in the sun
But the hills that we climbed were just seasons out of time

Goodbye Papa, please pray for me
I was the black sheep of the family
You tried to teach me right from wrong
Too much wine and too much song
Wonder how I got along

Goodbye Papa, it's hard to die
When all the birds are singing in the sky
Now that the spring is in the air
Little children everywhere
When you see them I'll be there

We had joy we had fun we had seasons in the sun
But the wine and the song like the seasons have all gone
We had joy we had fun we had seasons in the sun
But the wine and the song like the seasons have all gone

Goodbye Michelle, my little one
You gave me love and helped me find the sun
And every time that I was down
You would always come around
And get my feet back on the ground

愛しミシェル、さよなら
君が愛をくれて、太陽を見つけるために助けてくれた
いつも僕が落ち込んでいるとき、
君がやってきて
僕が落ち着けるまで付き合ってくれた

Goodbye Michelle, it's hard to die
When all the birds are singing in the sky
Now that the spring is in the air
With the flowers everywhere
I wish that we could both be there

愛しミシェル、鳥たちが空に歌っているときに
死ぬことが大変だよ
花が何処でも咲いていて
春の香りがもうやってきたので、
二人で、そこに一緒いることを望んでいる

We had joy we had fun we had seasons in the sun
But the hills that we climbed were just seasons out of time
We had joy we had fun we had seasons in the sun
But the wine and the song like the seasons have all gone
We had joy we had fun we had seasons in the sun
But the hills that we climbed were just seasons out of time
We had joy we had fun we had seasons in the sun
But the wine and the song like the seasons have all gone

*The name "Michelle" used in this article is just fictional. Actually, it is used in the original lyrics.
*ミシェルという名前ははフィクションです。